In the years since my sons left home, walking has become our shared bond. It started as a way to spend time together, but now it's a ritual that keeps us connected. When they were young, we walked with them, carrying them in backpacks and coaxing them along with snacks and stories. As they grew, we handed them the weight of their own packs, and hiking became our family's tradition. Summer holidays meant hiking, and winter meant ski touring. This was our way of life.
However, when we embarked on the Camino de Santiago a decade ago, the dynamic had shifted. My husband and I realized that this walk marked a significant transition in our lives. One son had just finished school, and the other was about to graduate from university. Their lives were taking them elsewhere, and we were on borrowed time. It was a moment of letting go and embracing change.
The Camino was a long, unplanned goodbye, a ritual that we didn't know we needed. It taught us that parenting doesn't end when children leave home; it evolves. We learned to let go of control and adapt to a new role. This realization was bittersweet, as it meant that the job of raising children was largely complete, but it also opened up a new chapter in our lives.
Since then, we've continued to walk together, at least twice a year. We choose a trail and step onto it as equals. Each journey is unique, shaped by the people present, but the purpose remains the same. These walks provide us with uninterrupted, shared time in a world where attention is fragmented. Phones drop out of service, and conversations unfold slowly, allowing us to truly connect and understand each other.
Walking together enables us to enter each other's lives without intrusion. We don't need to ask about work or relationships; instead, we observe them navigating challenges and appreciate their struggles and adaptations. And, most importantly, they now carry more weight than we do.
These journeys are a reminder of the impermanence of life. We know that our time together is finite, and at the end of each walk, we will disperse to different cities and countries. But rather than resisting this truth, the walks contain it. They allow us to part ways well, knowing that we have walked a long way together and will continue to move forward in the same direction, even if we walk apart most of the time.
